They are sticky, dynamic, beautiful, created by God, attacked by the enemy, necessary for abundant life, painful at times, et cetera, et cetera.
As a result of living in a fallen world, I have been hurt by people I’ve been in relationship with, just as I’ve regrettably hurt others.
So somewhere along the way I sought to protect myself from any further pain,
and I began to project onto God things He never promised.
For instance, out of fear of having my heart broken, I would tell myself that if I truly sought the Lord in whomever I date in the future, He would immediately lead me to “the one” so that I never had to be ‘that brokenhearted girl.’
Similarly, after loosing a couple good friends along the way, I comforted myself by saying that if I kept Christ at the center of my friendships, He would weld them together and we would never grow apart or loose our bond.
As you could probably guess,
I was wrong, very wrong.
I can seek the Lord in my relationships and be broken up with,
just as I can seek Him in my friendships and watch friends walk away.
What I failed to comprehend is that sometimes, God’s perfect plan and purpose
is truly for a person to only occupy a space in my life for a season.
For a while, I wrestled with this reality.
I don’t do well with goodbyes or change,
so I thought it would be easier to build Jericho sized walls around my heart and only maintain superficial relationships.
Then I came across this quote that rocked my world and my relationships:
” To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”
We have two options:
1. Never experience pain, heartbreak, loss, or any of the wonderful attributes of relationships.
2. Be vulnerable, live in relationship with others, learn and grow with them, even if only for a season.